Things I misunderstood

• I used to think:
  “Prima Donnna”
  was:
  “Pre-Madonna”
  meaning:
  Her uppediness even precursed even God's mother.
• I used to think:
  “Pallbearer”
  was:
  “Palm Bearer”
  meaning:
  Well, you use your palms to grip the casket handles. I thought maybe "bearing my palm" was some way of showing repect.
• I used to think:
  “Alzheimer's Disease”
  was:
  “Old Timer's Disease”
  meaning:
  It must be so common to get this one when you get old. I mean, you do forget shit when you get old. Right?
• I used to think:
  “Notary Public”
  was:
  “Note of Republic”
  meaning:
  Some kind of legal document... so legal that it's some how related to our entire republic-type civilization.
• I used to think:
  “Women’s Lib.”
  was:
  “Women’s Live”
  meaning:
  Women are really livin' it up now that there's more equality, or this is the way they want to live.
• I used to think:
  “Making ends meet”
  was:
  “Making ends-meat”
  meaning:
  Something about affording enough groceries, particulary meat groceries you want to have Friday night.
• I used to think:
  “Pulitzer Prize”
  was:
  “Pullet Surprise”
  meaning:
  I knew it was some kind of award: “Oh, he won the Pullet Surprise for medicine. He totally didn't expect it.”